All reports home from my son's first-grade teacher indicate that he's a good student, polite, and well behaved. So why is doing homework so much like trying to push a stubborn elephant? The act of getting him through homework is so frustrating to both myself and my spouse that we become almost irrational. We're both fully aware that the behavior is circular: we know that our frustration negatively affects his performance, and that in turn frustrates us all the more, and so on and so on. We also fully recognize that the problem is more with us than with him. We'd just like some tips to help prevent us from getting so frustrated, and keep him on a positive track.
I've read questions like this in this forum before and the answers all tended toward whether or not you're a ';good teacher.'; I consider that irrelevant. We don't need to know how to teach, we need to know how to stop getting frustrated and stop letting our frustration negatively affect our son's attitude toward academics.Any advice to a parent trying to help his son with homework?
Have him do his homework at the same place and the same time everyday. That's a start. Be consistant. If it's a lot, let him take a break between. We do my sons written homework the same time everyday, then later on we do his reading. If he is sitting and doing his homework, don't hover, just be close by if he needs help. Reward him w/ something when he has completed his work. Ex: No video games that day until homework is done. It won't happen overnight. Just be consistant and firm. He will sit at the table until his work is done. No ';fun'; until then. If older, I'd suggest him going to school w/ his work not done and suffering the consequence of ';no recess'; or whatever his school would do. I know that matters to my son. Good luck. Be patient. When things start to ';heat up';...walk away, count to ten. Then try again. He's young...you can set the tone for years to come. I watch 6 kids after school, and 4 of them, 2 being my own, have to do their homework here. I've seen it all.Any advice to a parent trying to help his son with homework?
I feel your pain. Everyone has responded with good advice. I would agree with them that setting a schedule (countdowns are great to help with that transition from play to homework!) would be a good place to start. We do a 45 minute relax/snack period after school. Then we start with homework, reading library book first, then I let them choose what they do after that (spelling and math usually).
If there is a problem with them making progress on their own, and I start getting frustrated, they start getting frustrated, time for a TIME OUT. I explain that if they arent going to do their homework WITH my help, then they will do it WITHOUT my help. I get up, go calm down, do some housework, etc, while they figure out that they would rather have me there to help. Timeouts are good for everyone, including parents.
Hope you get what you need to change your situation!! Best to you!
it took me alot of years and three boys to figure this one out. first- set a time and place, stick to it. don't give in to the argument. give him time warnings.'; 30 minutes until homework time, 15 min...... '; then homework. tv off maybe music on. if he can do it himself, let him. tell him you'll check it when he's done. don't hover. when he needs help he will ask for it. yes he will. you'll, no doubt , get an attempt at another argument when it comes time to fix errors. don't argue. walk away from it. if you want, pay your bills or read a book nearby where he can see you. he'll know you're there if he needs you. you already know that frustraton leads to frustration. you can do this. it takes time, patience and practice. commit yourselves to being calm. make a plan. if one of you feels you are going to lose it then you get to walk away till you are calm. it won't take long to see the change. he may still grumble but it'll get done. good luck.
I have 3 children and all seem to be great at school but when it came to homework they couldn't do it or understand it. The teachers said they didn't seem to be having trouble in class but I disagreed. I was getting more frustrated than them. I finally had an assessment done at Kip McGrath tuitoring. I was right. My middle daughter in year 7 stop learning in year 4. After 5 months at tutoring she has caught up to year 8 education, my youngest is in grade 2 and is now reading at the same level as grade 3. My eldest caught up in maths and proudly finished highschool with passes in all subjects. Before beginning tutoring a free assessment was done and there is no contract time they have to be there. All my children are happy and confident. I was also told not to help with homework as the way I was taught is not how they are being taught now which is confusing the kids. P.S This is the best money I have every spent........
Does he actually need help to complete the assignments? Or does he know how to do them? If he knows how to do it, step out! It's his responsibility. Let him take ownership of it.
If he needs help, you might start with the assignment that you think he has the greatest chance of being successful at. Let him do that one first to build up confidence. Celebrate his completion of it. Then tackle the harder subject.
Maybe BOTH of you need a little protein snack before tackling homework?
Keep in mind that your job is simply to make sure he has the time, place and materials to get the work done. Stay in contact with his teacher about any struggles you are having.
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